The light is here
By Millie Grenough
Special to Out & About
from the

"God appears, and God is Light." So says poet William Blake. Cameron, my 8-year-old neighbor shouts, "The days are getting longer! Yippee!"

I asked some shoreline friends for their thoughts about this Season of Light.

"For you, what's the best?"
Guilfordite Letty M. Russell, an Emeritus Professor of Theology at the Yale Divinity School, answers, "Gathering with people and being able to celebrate both my own family traditions and my own Christian tradition."

"Having family around," says Madison architect Garry Leonard. Garry's wife Nancy, a communications specialist, and April Shuman, Associate Director of the Mercy Center in Madison, agree: "Being with friends and family, always."

Another friend, a sandwich-generation mom, exclaims, "It being over!"

Retailers add a slightly different perspective. Stephanie Clark and Mary Babinski, co-owners of Fleur de Lis in Branford, answer "Making our customers happy. Having a husband or grandma come in and get the 'perfect gift.' We feel like we're under everybody's tree." David Venables, co-owner of Trailblazer in Guilford and Mohegan Sun, says "Getting to see a lot of people that I don't see all year."

"The worst?"
Answers range from "the effort to go through traffic to get anywhere" (Letty), a light-hearted "chopping onions - it makes me cry" (Nancy), "working so hard to get everything together that you're exhausted at the event itself" (Garry), to "I feel sad because I realize that for many people this is a difficult time; they don't have as much as we do" (April).

The unnamed friend quoted above ("It being over!") adds, "What I really do not like is that everybody is rushing around in this commercialism and they forget what the holidays are about. Before I got involved in a mixed-religion marriage, I was able to do that - to shut out the places I thought were off-track. But it's much harder now."

The "worsts" for the store-owners? David - "long hours, hard work." Mary - "running out of stuff." Stephanie - "not being able to have something somebody's looking for."

"How do you get through the tough parts?"
April - "remind myself of the reason for the season and what's really important. Give myself some quiet time. Maybe two minutes to light a candle, or sit and look at the tree lights."

My unnamed friend - "When people in my husband's family ask me what I want, I say 'Give a contribution to something like the Women and Family Life Center in Guilford in the name of the holidays.'"

"Make every effort to celebrate it at home," says Letty. Nancy sighs a bit, "Try to get shopping done ahead of time so that the larder is full." Her husband Garry has an opposite shopping strategy: "Shop at the last minute to avoid stressing for a long time. Just go out and do it." (Be ready, you retailers. Garry may still be coming.)

The shop-owners? David - "run up and down East Rock at 2 AM."

Stephanie - "shut off the cell phone and TV. Take time out. Visit with a friend."

Mary - "a bit of solitude, cup of tea, realizing that it is a luxury to enjoy peace."

Me? As soon as I finish this, get up and stretch. Write myself a note to call the soup kitchen. Breathe a prayer of thanks that I am healthy, fairly sane, have a family, live in a warm home, and that - as my little neighbor says - the days are getting longer. Yippee!

Editor's note: Millie Grenough is an author, personal/professional coach and motivational speaker, clinical instructor in the Social Work of Psychiatry at the Yale University School of Medicine. Millie is president of the New Haven-based Grenough LLC and is an associate of the Corporate Coaching Center. Her new book OASIS in the Overwhelm: 60-second strategies for balance in a busy world offers quick relief for busy people. Contact Millie by visiting www.grenough.com and www.oasisintheoverwhelm.com